Myself for the first time
I lay down
My last cries
the sounds of birds
in flight away
from here
How long I wait
the repeal
the swing
The bludgeoned slaves
their caskets dressed in flowers
rolling out
like mats that cover the
earth where
You step
Covered
the dropping stars
behind the mass
kneeling clouds give
up,
asking to be fixed
How long?
How long O Lord
I want to give
up
Myself for the first time
I lay down
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCN6RhdeErE
Atlantic Crossing trailer
Psalm 102 (Listen)
Do Not Hide Your Face from Me
A Prayer of one afflicted, when he is faint and pours out his complaint before the Lord.
102:1 Hear my prayer, O Lord;
let my cry come to you!
Do not hide your face from me
in the day of my distress!
Incline your ear to me;
answer me speedily in the day when I call!
For my days pass away like smoke,
and my bones burn like a furnace.
My heart is struck down like grass and has withered;
I forget to eat my bread.
Because of my loud groaning
my bones cling to my flesh.
I am like a desert owl of the wilderness,
like an owl [1] of the waste places;
I lie awake;
I am like a lonely sparrow on the housetop.
All the day my enemies taunt me;
those who deride me use my name for a curse.
For I eat ashes like bread
and mingle tears with my drink,
because of your indignation and anger;
for you have taken me up and thrown me down.
My days are like an evening shadow;
I wither away like grass.
But you, O Lord, are enthroned forever;
you are remembered throughout all generations.
You will arise and have pity on Zion;
it is the time to favor her;
the appointed time has come.
For your servants hold her stones dear
and have pity on her dust.
Nations will fear the name of the Lord,
and all the kings of the earth will fear your glory.
For the Lord builds up Zion;
he appears in his glory;
he regards the prayer of the destitute
and does not despise their prayer.
Let this be recorded for a generation to come,
so that a people yet to be created may praise the Lord:
that he looked down from his holy height;
from heaven the Lord looked at the earth,
to hear the groans of the prisoners,
to set free those who were doomed to die,
that they may declare in Zion the name of the Lord,
and in Jerusalem his praise,
when peoples gather together,
and kingdoms, to worship the Lord.
He has broken my strength in midcourse;
he has shortened my days.
“O my God,” I say, “take me not away
in the midst of my days—
you whose years endure
throughout all generations!”
Of old you laid the foundation of the earth,
and the heavens are the work of your hands.
They will perish, but you will remain;
they will all wear out like a garment.
You will change them like a robe, and they will pass away,
but you are the same, and your years have no end.
The children of your servants shall dwell secure;
their offspring shall be established before you.
Since I graduated in May, I haven’t really been that interested in writing with words. I’ve thought a lot about words and written some, spoken a bunch, sang some. I also use words in electronic messages every day – in text, email, Facebook, whatever device. Most of my creative energy is centered on being trained by a former professor of mine, growing my skills in Final Cut and shooting in verite documentary style, being connected to the power of thought conveyed in images, spoken words, and music combined to make what we call a “film.” Digital storytelling is a very current approach to disseminating information, and it’s also a lot of fun, for the maker and the viewer alike.
Working in documentary merges the new media angle with a conscious effort to tell a true, “verite” as it were, story. Being aware that documentary portrays a real life event, I often have to take stock and wonder – what gives me the clarity or good sense to sift through the mundane events of an extended period of time and piece together a story that makes sense, is compelling, and develops a character? This medium asserts that something must happen. And to become a focused editor, you must be as concerned with the larger piece as you are with the single frame. To do that well, you must understand the way life works. There is a surge of meaning, a moment that you realize is too long. Something must come to pass, pacing takes hold. The pace of things on screen is not the same as the pace in life, because it is shortened and taken into the editing system. The pace of film is the pace of your thoughts. You must be able to feel the roll of the moment, and know when it is coming to an end.
What I’ve been doing at Rutgers by documenting academic stories through the voices of the very people who are inspiring new generations of marine biologists, female scholars and activists, and storytellers whether on word or on screen has taught me that a lot of a non-fiction writer’s perspective has to be bonded in trust with the people whose story she is telling. Even if the trust is as simple as a smile while I hold the camera or concern over how their voice or image is portrayed, there has to be a relationship there. An interview, especially, requires a lot of trust from people when they would not otherwise be willing to tell their point of view to even one person let alone an indefinite public.
helped me to see that the world is always changing, the lapse of time on video is the same as it is in real life and ours is a documented culture like none other has ever been. Will this help us to come together? In documentary, I’m forced to take stock of a person as a character – which means they must potentially be able to grow.
I don’t know what the climax of this kind of media will be
or what can come beyond it. It’s hard for me to see how telling a story in 2
minutes can get any shorter, but I’m sure someone will find a way.
Check out our documentary team below:
http://wh.rutgers.edu/component/jvideo/watch/75/the-making-of-atlantic-crossing
My friend Kevin Olitan started a traveling music video site about New Brunswick featuring local bands and/or poets, artists, etc. plus everyone else on the street.
Here is his site. Please check it out! Lots of good things happening in da Bruns.
And here's the Wanderer session that Kevin and Christine Tram did with me. I did a Sufjan cover and one of my own.
ENJOY!
<3 to you
play the new song here on myspace page: jesus
lyrics:
Jesus
I'd go all night just to see you
I'd take a boat on the water
I would meet you on the other side
I am the one
you want to know
I bet it's got to hurt a little
just to know
I'm around
You brought me gifts
I brought you gifts
We'll bring eachother gifts
Of that I'm sure
You're the one I want to see
Cuz you take good care of me
You, me and Jesus
that makes three
What a friend we have in Jesus
What a friend we have in Jesus
"Us" is not a word
I've really ever known
how to use
Do you know?
It's way to big for me
Can you explain it?
I'd go anywhere with you
to the desert, even the zoo
I'll go if that's what you want to do
As long as we can go with
Jesus
I'll go anywhere you want to go
as long as I can go
with you
and Jesus
Our first day in Paris! We slept in and enjoyed unpacking, setting up house in our lovely apartment. We found the coffee and were pleasantly surprised that it was delicious! See, we have imported CDM (Cafe du Monde) coffee from the beignet cafe in the French Quarter by the same name for eons. It is very strong and full-flavored, but so was the Tazza coffee Raymonde had supplied for us. Paris and good coffee! We were blessed! We gradually woke up and prepared for the day's outing, the Musee d'Orsay, known for its large collection of Impressionist work. Following the advice we had received that carrying cash really wasn't necessary, that we could use our credit cards for everything, we set off for the metro station.
The transportation system in Paris is impressive. I loved how the bus stops were marked and followed by the drivers, no stopping here, there and everywhere. Each had a name and there were maps on the stops showing the routes of the lines that stopped there. Also available are maps of all sizes of all the systems from metro to bus and train lines. Our apartment was located about 15 yards from the metro station and just a little farther from the bus stop.
We headed to the metro station. About to be tested were several pieces of advice we had received. First was the existence of the Carte Orange, a transportation pass that allows you to get on and off busses and metro cars and travel around the city without having to buy individual tickets. Secondly, that we would have no problem with the fact that we don't speak French. "Between English or Spanish, you will be able to communicate, especially using your Spanish." So we arrive at the bank of ticketing machines and attempt to buy two Carte Orange, but the machine doesn't seem to want to accept our credit card. So to the Information lady and, you guessed it, she doesn't speak English or Spanish but she speaks French very quickly and somehow in the stream of words after pointing to the picture of the Carte orange on her door, Bob understands that it no longer exists. So, back to the machines where we now need to buy four tickets using the few Euros we had from our exchange with the red cap at the airport in Mexico City. But first we try another machine to see if it will accept out credit card for purchasing regular tickets. About this time a lady stops to ask if she can help us. At least we took it that she wanted to help because she, too, spoke only French. She listened to us explain (I think we were using Spanish which is our default language when speaking with someone who doesn't speak English) and then she went to the information lady and questioned her as to why we couldn't buy the Carte Orange. We stood there smiling apologetically as she got the same message, "Finí." It is finished. Then she helps us buy our four tickets all the time speaking a steady stream of French, none of which we could understand but it did not bother her. She was so nice we just listened and smiled (it was like our Spearhead days all over again). She gave us our tickets, one to me, one to Bob and the extras to him as well and we followed in tow behind her to the ticket turnstile. At last! Something we knew! You put your ticket in and the turnstile opens to admit you. But wait! Bob put in his ticket and the thing didn't move. So our helper reached up midway on the machine where his ticket had magically reappeared, took it out and handed it to him, explaining, what we did not know, but we got it that he should put it in his pocket and keep it. Por que? Quien sabe. So much for looking like we knew what we were doing in some part of the process. Soon the three of us were doing the walk/run to the metro platform but another problem surfaced. These doors had latches on them or at least they appeared to have latches on them (as opposed to the automatic doors on the Mexican metro car) so we had to watch someone open the door to figure it out. Once inside our French helper contined chatting happily at us. Then her face got serious. She lowered her voice (because at least everyone else in the car understood what she was saying) and gave me some sort of instruction. When she patted her large purse and put it in front of her I knew exactly what she was telling me. I knew she was instructing me to watch my purse on the metro line. It was like Spearhead all over again.
We arrived at the museum a bit breathless and somewhat worn out by our simple purchasing of four metro tickets to find that, yes, they accepted our credit card at the museum. But not at the sandwich place afterward which meant walking the streets until we found a regular restaurant which would. Tomorrow we would exhange money and not be left penniless or Euroless (which equals a whole lotta pennies) as we walked the streets of Paris.
But in the meantime we found the room we wanted to start in, the one with Vincent Van Gogh and spent an entire afternoon drinking in the colors and brush strokes, the Art Nouveau furniture, and the building itself that is the Musee d'Orsay. What a way to begin our Parisian education. If only I had asked Antoine Barois for some language lessons before leaving Mexico. Well, maybe next time.
First I need to introduce Emilia to you. She came to work for us eleven years ago when her son Victor was a baby. The day after she began working for us her husband abandoned her, her 14-year-old son and her baby, about 7 months-old. Emilia has had a hard life. She had to drop out of elementary school in second grade when her mother died. Being the only girl in the family she had to help with the cooking and cleaning and such. Consequently Emilia is uneducated in such things as how to read a map but is a good mother and wise in many practical things of life.
I needed to tell you this before you look at the following photo from our trip. Look closely at it. What would you answer if someone asked you "What do you see in this photo?"
After I finished preparing the Smilebox of photos from the trip I played it for Emilia during lunch one day so she could see where we had gone and what we had done, trying to explain it all to her. When this photo came up her comment was, "My! That man sure does have some white tennis shoes!" I laughed out loud! She had washed his tennis shoes for Bob just for him to take on our trip. In the Hall of Mirrors Emilia saw white tennis shoes.
of Jet Lag
Continuing to follow the injunction to push through the jet lag, we went to Versailles on Wednesday. I think we thought we were ready for a full day trip but we realized we had not yet made the transition out of jet lag within two hours after arriving to the ChateauVersailles. Bob bought tickets for general admission into the estate and also purchased the guided tour which would mean going with a smaller group into the royal family's private suite of rooms and apartments, areas not open to the general public mainly because they keep a close watch on those entering these areas reminding people not to lean against ornately carved and guilded walls or to sit on the furniture.
While waiting for our tour time we strolled with the rest of the crowd through the museum. It was packed with people. We shuffled from one room to the next until we were just ready to be done. Bob went for baguette sandwiches and drinks and we ate lunch on the steps of the ticketing offices. We enjoyed the quieter smaller group on the private tour but by the time we were done with a thorough viewing of the interior of the palace and went to buy tickets for the small train that would take us to other parts of the huge property, we were exhausted. I think the change in altitude from Mexico City combined with the jet lag left us dragging for a longer time than if we only had dealt with jet lag alone. At any rate, this is the one thing I would have changed about our trip. I would have gone to Versailles after our bodies had acclimated because I would have loved to spend the whole day investigating all the gardens on the grounds of the estate. I would love to return to stroll through all the outdoor "rooms" set into the wooded and hedged areas. I would love to spend an afternoon visiting Marie Antoinette's private world that began with the gift of The Petit Trianon for her personal use and gradually became her own little world of garden and working farm and hamlet put together by her architect and artistic director following her plans. But, while we enjoyed the ride on the tiny motorized "train," we had no energy left for getting out and exploring the grounds further. I even had to make myself walk out to the end of the reflecting pools to take a few photos. If we ever return.
http://en.chateauversailles.fr If you are a visit to the chateau, check out this excellent web site.
Mexico Journal - Preparation
Journal Topic: Taking on God’s Heart for the Poor
The
book of James is often quoted for its passage about faith and works,
the necessary partnership between the two in the Christian life. You
must believe in Christ, but then you must also act as if this belief
has taken you over and is now living through you.
Part of this, says James, is fulfilling the command to “love thy neighbor as thyself, which is, according to Jesus, second only in importance to loving God and honoring him full-heartedly. And in this same thought, James says “show no partiality,” i.e. one neighbor is not different from the other. If you are really loving your neighbors, you should be relating to and blessing both the rich and poor in your life. Some recent commentators have posited that the rich Western church should show even greater responsibility towards the poor, in a way becoming partial to their needs above our own.
Mexico is considered to be a "developing nation". They are at not at either extreme what the U.N. considers to be the high-consumption, high-income nations or lowest income, highest food need nations (see http://www.un.org/special-rep/ohrlls/ldc/list.htm). In 2004, the World Bank found that 13.8% of Mexicans were living in the "food-based definition of poverty" and more than 40% were living in "asset based poverty."
In Chalco, you may encounter poverty that you have not witnessed first-hand before. But you may also find a richness and a peace in people’s lives, an exuberant spirit that seems to come not from excessive amounts of material possessions, but from family life and the jovial power of Christ. There have been many times in my travels through Mexico when I have wondered how this can be possible – that the poor are truly blessed, that they seem to understand God’s word and his wonderful love even more than those who are materially gifted on this earth.
Questions to ponder:
What does it mean that the poor are
“heirs of the kingdom?” Why are the poor so prominently featured as the
object of God’s focus throughout scripture? Is it possible that God
cares much more for the poor than we do and so he must continuously
remind us of their need? What would it look like for us to have a new
theology of poverty, taking on Jesus’ perspective – that they are
blessed? Ask God to inform your heart and let you take on his view of
those who are materially and spiritually poor.
Think also on Matthew 25. How can we serve the poor as if they were actually Jesus right in front of us?
Scripture:
All of James 2
Matthew 25:40
“Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.”
Luke 6:20,24
“Blessed
are you poor, for yours is the kingdom of heaven…But woe unto you who
are rich! For you have received your consolation.”
Prayer Point:
Lord Jesus, it takes a miracle of faith to follow you. And to go from belief to action is even harder. God, as we seek to follow your commands, please provide us with the ability to serve the poor and to love our neighbor in deed. Give us understanding and courage as we face the fact of poverty and the great needs in our world. May we be a part of your plan to bless the poor.
